Antithesis I: Pandemonium
by Alice Liddell
Summary: The Mad Hatter's on the streets, and the Batman's on the prowl. Disclaimer: this one's dark and not for the faint of heart.  No seriously; you've been warned...
1. Chapter 1

She was the light, pure innocence and beauty in a compact and lithe, tiny human form. She was the envy of the sun and the moon and the stars all at an instance. Skin of silk and of ivory. Hair of the radiant dawn and eyes of the summer rain. Purest in heart and soul and perfectly innocent. But in her innocence she could not feel the danger she was in; for in innocence lies the most deadliest of ailments; ignorance. Perhaps it could even be argued that she had not been meant for this world.

She had found her place at the swing set swinging as high as she could, her arms reaching out. Reaching out as if trying to but touch the face of the heavens so to become better acquainted with her God. Such a surreal scene as it must have seemed to all those who saw her for those few fleeting seconds. Seconds which seemed to blow away in the howling winds which seemed to be pushing the girl along. What was to occur next was so well and precisely timed that it would seem by most to have been calculated as if by will.

As she reached the lowly point in the motion of swinging where she was at her closest to the ground, a small group of people on bicycles passed her by. And as they passed the swing as it reeled back it could be seen that there was no longer any inhabitant to be found here. The girl was gone. Anyone who was there would always remember the terrible wailing of a panicked mother as she looked for that which was most precious to her. She approached the empty swing set, first only walking forward in confusion, gazing all around. Searching for any sign of where the girl may have run off to. But the closer she got, the quicker the realizations began to take hold of her mind. The police were called and the area searched again and again. But they already knew that they wouldn't find her as this had become so familiar to them. This had all happened before. They knew that they had two weeks to find her. They knew what would happen if the failed. The price of failure. Finally, on the sixteenth day, they found her in a secluded back alley.

The sight was horrific beyond what most of them were able to handle. Most of the officers on sight had become ill upon viewing the scene and had to maintain a fair distance from it as a result. Most stayed away and kept to the shadows where they could not see. They kept to that lowly place where the shadows took away their sight. Only a handful of the CSI team were left to survey the ghastly scene.

Finally, one single solemn and solitary figure came from the shadows which engulfed the whole world around the epicenter that the alley had become. He knew better than most what scene awaited for him, and he knew he had to face it. But that didn't mean he had to like it. There was no pleasure to be taken here. Gordon Felt sick. Not this again, he thought to himself almost aloud, words barely being bitten back from spilling from his mouth; not another one. Not another family to visit and consul. Not another press release stating that he had failed to save the day. To save another girl. Like a dog chasing a tail which always seemed just out of reach. Always close, but never near enough. The whole world had gone mad. Now even he was starting to denounce himself. He was starting to lose faith in the truths which kept him from insanity. But each day, he could feel himself bring pulled a little bit more into that darkness. To a place from which there could be no return. He could still remember all of their faces, faces of victims which would forever haunt him. Faces that had already and would continue to visit him and haunt him without end. And there he would be, helpless to save them, doomed to watch from an inescapable darkness forevermore.

He felt tired of all of this, tired of the world as the weight of it all had started to crush him. Exhausted with the reality of a mad world. He felt worn down more and more with each passing moment. It was almost beyond his understanding, and he would scarcely have believed it had he not had the unfortunate duty to bear witness to the horrific results of insanity. He needed absolution. He needed salvation. He needed to be saved from the hell of insanity's making. He needed to catch this guy.

When the first note had appeared at the unit, no one took it seriously; it seemed to them to be too surreal to be taken seriously. It was sick in that he had made clear his intention to find his beloved "Alice" even if he had to kill every young girl in the city to find her. And it had been signed: with love, "The Mad Hatter". Then over a month's time later, when the note had already been long forgotten, another one was sent to the unit. But this time, he had made it clear that he had already found his first "candidate" for the role of his beloved "Alice". And to legitimize his claim, the note came accompanied with a pair of bloodied underwear. Thirteen days later, they had found the first victim, covered in a white shroud; the words "She was not Alice; no, not Alice at all" written in blood all across it's clean, hallowed surface. Under it, they found the brutalized remains of an eleven year old girl, wrapped in a light blue dress and bound with a white apron. Memoires that would forever haunt him to the day he joined them in sweet salvation.

When the media came to be aware of what had happened, with the MCU (Major Crimes Unit) having been warned by the perpetrator himself long before he acted, as they ignored him as he mercilessly snatched then brutally murdered his first victim; they tore the unit apart. The public backlash was unprecedented. Even in a city full of hard-core psychotics running around, nothing like this had been seen before. The incident almost cost Gordon his post as Commissioner. To say nothing of what the media had to say when this "Mad Hatter" struck a second time, and then a third. But that was over a year ago; now the body count was up to thirteen.

* * *

"Victim's name was Melissa Parkinson, ten years old. Victim was fifty inches tall, sixty eight pounds. Hair was blonde and eyes were... blue. Time of death is estimated to be approximately twelve to fourteen hours ago, based on current degradation of core body temperature to... sixty eight degrees Fahrenheit, consistent with current room temperature. Rigor mortis seems to have taken full effect, also consistent with estimated time of death. For the record, please note that because of warmer seasonal weather, rigor mortis may have been accelerated. Victim's arms and legs, all limbs have been removed at the joints and drained of blood, also making the exact level of decomposition more difficult to properly ascertain. The victim's face and torso are covered in... fifty seven contusions and... forty five deep lacerations. The limbs are covered in... thirty eight contusions and, uh... twenty three deep lacerations. Most prominent are the contusions found around the victim's neck which take on the resemblance of human hands, indicating that the victim was strangled by hand multiple times, likely near to and stopping short of the point of death. Some of these showing signs of healing, some seemed to be fresh by estimated time of death. Both zygomatic bones, the cranium, and the maxilla are fractured at multiple points from repeated trauma. The mandible is also broken at multiple points and seems to have been dislocated. Mandible shows slight healing, which seems to indicate that the dislocation was committed early in captivity. Also, the nasal bones and the bridge of the nose seems to have been broken and also shows signs of healing, indicating that this trauma was also committed early in captivity. In contrast, all other fractures give no indications at healing but hardly seem fresh, which indicates that the trauma was started early on but likely repeated, giving them no time to start the healing process. The the ninth, tenth, and eleventh ribs on the left lateral and the eighth and ninth ribs on the right lateral of the ribcage have been broken from repeated trauma. The sternum... as well seems to have been fractured. Uh... sexual trauma is... clearly evident as well (sniff). The... uh, victim's hymen seems to have been ruptured early on and the, uh... labia majora is swollen from repeated physical abuse. Twelve of forty five deep cuts to the torso were located in this... uh, region as well. (Sigh) Genital mutilation; Jesus... shit. Ah, the uh(sniff)... uh labia minora is also swollen... and inflamed and shows sign of tearing, also from repeated abuse. Further examination into the urethral meatus revealed urethral prolapse. Anal and rectal scaring and tearing has... uh, also be discovered, as well as rectal prolapse. In addition to this, the, uh... victim's mouth and uh, th... uh (cough), throat seems to have been burned from prolonged exposure to chlorine, with trace amounts having been found in the specified areas. More than(sniff) likely used to uh, remove any trace evidence from the victim's mouth and throat... left over... from uh, oral sex. Jesus Christ, there's dried blood everywhere; sick mother fucker didn't even bother to clean her off. (Sigh) All limbs were present at the crime scene and have been recovered. All fingers and toes have (sniff)been fractured in a manner consistent with being smashed with a blunt object, possibly a hammer. The... finger and toe nails seemed to have been removed forcefully. All digits show signs of healing. This indicates that the victim was alive at the time of the aforementioned acts, for a period of... at least two to four, uh (sniff)... days prior to estimated... time of death. There is also tearing of the tissue around the glenohumeral joints of both arms, consistent with shoulder dislocation, possibly even shoulder separation. This also shows signs of healing, albeit incorrectly for a period of ... (sniff) four to six days prior to estimated time of... uh, death. The..uh, ulna in the left forearm seems to have been broken recently, with no indication as to healing just yet. The humerus in the left arm shows... multiple hairline fractures (sniff), also with no indication as to healing yet. Probably broken in a struggle (sniff). Examination to the legs finds the patella of both knees have... uh, been crushed, also most probably, with a hammer. Completely crushed, beyond repair. Despite this... some healing seems to have taken place, also incorrectly however. this would indicate that this was done within the first few days of captivity, possibly to keep the victim from... uh, running. All incisions at all points of amputation which run along the cutaneous and subcutaneous layers of the skin seem clean with a high level of precision. This indicates the use of a sharp, straight edged blade, possibly a uh, scalpel. In contrast, the incisions along the underlying muscle is uneven in a manner... (sniff) uh, consistent with a serrated blade; more than likely a, uh, hacksaw. All amputations seemed to have been... uh, done post mortem. As previously mentioned, all limbs been drained completely of blood. There... uh, there is also a deep incision which runs from just below the xiphoid process to just above the... uh, mons pubis. This incision seems to have been made for the explicit... purpose of... uh, disembowelment, and s... uh, seems to have been sowed shut post mortem. Upon opening the incision, it was discovered that... uh, the, uh... liver, spleen, both kidneys (sigh)... uh, gall bladder, stomach, large and small intestine, and uh, bladder have all been removed and have...(sigh) yet to uh, yet to be recovered. The incision and uh... more than likely some of the disembowelment seems to have been started pre mortem and is the uh (sniff) ah, the uh... cause of death. " The corner had finished her notes and turned off the recorder. She was starting to become emotionally compromised. Great waves of emotion had started to drown out her logic and she could feel it starting to take effect. She could feel herself lapsing into sorrow and pity. Even hatred was starting to surface. Not even hatred for the one who had done this so much as it was a hatred for the fact that they had yet to apprehend him. This was the world they lived in. Then she realized that because of her profanity laden slips, she would have to re-record her notes all over again. At the thought of having to repeat this portion of the examination, she let out a long and heavy sigh and rolled her eyes, as an angry grunt escaped from her subconscious mind. Thus, the price of her compromised logic. The horrors which seemed to rip apart every fiber of her logical state of mind.

"I know; it... it's uh, tough to comprehend, isn't it..." spoke a man in the shadows who stood at the doors to the examination room. The sudden realization of having been pulled back into the conscious world around her physical person made her jump in surprise.

"Damn it Jim you... you sacred me; fuck! I wasn't expecting you today. Did you want my report, because..."

"No, I heard everything. Just like the others. Pretty cut n dry." Gordon spoke in a flat tone, almost as if rehearsed. The evils that men do. Pretty cut and dry? Had Gordon seen such scenes of unspeakable cruelty and horror to have left his mind completely desensitized to the ghastly scenes?

How much was the job changing the man she had married? When they had first married, he was still a sergeant. He had been on the force for a while, but he hadn't seen anything like this yet. It was a happy time in their lives, the happiest time. This was an innocent time, before the darkness overcame Gotham.

But things began to change, right around the time Barbara was born. Things began to get worse, as the mobs became more organized, their tactics became far more brutal and far less discriminate. The number of innocent victims caught in the cross fire had started to rise considerably. All of this was bad enough, but of course not long after that, the first hard-core psychotics had started to hit the streets. So in response the city had set up the Major Crimes Unit to focus on this new class of criminal, and Jim voluntarily transferred to this new unit. And now here they were. Oh, God help him. God help all of them. She did not want to know what it would feel like to be desensitized to the horrors that he had seen. The horrors that she had only seen a small fraction of, and even that had proven enough to make her feel sick to her stomach. "Sarah?" the sound of her name brought her back to the examination room. Recently her mind seemed all too willing to wonder off to escape the horrors of the harsh reality.

"Look, can't you finish this later? You need a break. Need me to drive you home?"

"No, I'm alright, Jim. I... I have to finish this. You need to race home though, Babs'll be getting home from school, ya know." And at this he didn't even respond; he just smiled and left. By now he had come to realize the futility of drawing Sarah away from her work, especially on a major case like this. But before he went home for the day, he had one more stop to make.

* * *

It shown across the sky, emblazoned brightly upon the darkness of the night and of the clouds more a warning than a beacon. A warning to all of those who would do harm onto their fellow man. Know all of you that I am coming for you, it seemed to say. A Bat in the night sky. A symbol. A warning. And there, in the shadows of this great warning stood Gordon. Gordon hadn't been waiting long, less than five minutes, and he knew almost instinctively that he wouldn't be made to wait much longer. Though even in this late hour the city was alive, a harsh and howling wind carried away all the sound, the pulse of the city. Leaving him in the eerie silence in all which remained.

Then, from behind him, a hushed voice in the darkness.

"Commissioner...". And there, at the opposite edge of the roof, shrouded almost completely in the darkness that always seemed to surround him, crouched the Batman. Ears standing out most prominently from the top of his cowl like the horns of the devil himself, dark irises juxtaposed against the white of his eyes and a frown spread across what little was visible of his face. Somehow Gordon felt that Batman automatically attracted the darkness around him to his person and that it always hid him from plane sight, even in the broadest of daylight. More human than human, or so it would seem. More beast than man.

"How much do you know about the Hatter case?" Gordon asked him as he closed the distance between them.

"Enough" came the hushed response. Aside from his lips as he talked, Batman hadn't moved.

There he crouched, as still as a statue. When Gordon finally stood before him, Batman finally stood up. Out from behind the darkness of the black material of his cape came the black of gloved and gauntleted hands. He took the case file from Gordon, and he turned as he looked it over. Gordon adjusted the glasses upon his face as he talked, "All the information I have is in that file." And with a sigh, he looked up to the night sky, as the signal once more caught his attention. "I know that Joker and the Scarecrow are still at large, but you've forced them underground. They'll probably stay low for a while. This case should..." As his gaze dropped to once more land on Batman, Gordon found himself alone once more; Figures. Now with the Batman on the case as well, Gordon could finally rest easy, for tonight at least.

...To be continued...


	2. Chapter 2

It was a space in ambient darkness. A void in which not a glimmer of any light shining through at any point. Nothing but infinite shadows, stretching out endlessly in all directions. But in the darkness, there came still the distinct echoing of movement. The distinctive sounds of flapping wings standing out against the shadows and the distinctive screeching of bats as they came and went. But otherwise, there was nothing here.

Then, at last, there came a light piercing through the dark; distant at first, but only at first. As it neared, the droning of a vehicle could now also be heard reverberating through out the dark, bouncing off the cave's walls. Now a thousand bats took flight, leaving their places in the dark maelstrom. Illuminated by the headlights of a bleak and foreboding vehicle as it pulled to a sudden stop upon a platform which hung suspended several hundred feet from the base of the cave. Down into a terrible abyss. Then with a hiss, a canopy upon the top of the vehicle slid open, and out from the belly of the beast stood a darkly cloaked, brooding figure.

At first he stood in the dark. But as he walked several lights which hovered above him started to hum to life, casting light upon the surface of the platform, but still leaving much of the Batcave shrouded in darkness. As he neared the massive screens of an rather large and intimidating computer, he threw the Hatter case file down upon surface of the keyboard. Then he sat down before the computer as he paused in thought. Now his mind began to work overtime as he contemplated his next move. As he did this, he let out a tired sigh and removed the heavy cowl from his head, setting it aside.

This reveled a tired young man with dark hair. His eyes were focused and watered over and there were black circles forming under them. The look gave Bruce the appearance of a man possessed. A man whose soul was being eaten away by innumerable cruelties which long since become his world. A man who each time he put on this suit, faced mortal danger. And yet, despite this danger he had refused to withdraw from this chosen path. Instead, he kept coming back for more, time and time again. Night after night.

The sad fact was that, in many ways he was very much a man possessed. The sad fact was that he would probably keep running into the night and the abyss of madness until it finally proved to be the death of him. Or worse, it took him and twisted what he used to be until he became what he once hunted and destroyed. There was no denying that even he had long ago become aware of this fate should he continue. But this was all part of an illness which long ago consumed him. This life had become an addiction, the perfect drug. He needed this. It gave him life. It gave him purpose. This was now his whole reason to live.

He had become far too accustomed to this game. He had become a predator, hunting people who were more like him then he would ever admit aloud. And yet there he stood, one amongst the madness, even if he stood against it. He was as sick and as twisted an individual as the very villains he hunted, but he didn't care. As sick as the idea may have seemed to others, he needed his enemies. They gave him purpose. After all, what would Gotham be like if the city were free of them and he were no longer needed. What would become of him now that they were his whole world, his obsession? He already knew; he would die. he lived for the challenge, for the thrill of the game, and without it, he would die. This had become a game he was determined to win, and the only way to win was by killing all of his enemies. Of course winning this game meant that he would for all intents and purposes be committing suicide, but he didn't care. So long as he won, his own death would be irrelevant. If this was to be the price he was to pay for being the only one capable of this kind of fight then so be it. This meant that he had to find the Mad Hatter. He had to find him and he had to kill him.

* * *

The sky was ablaze with lightning; though it was now well past dusk. The lightning made everything as bright as the day that it became easy to forget that the day had been coming to a close, even if only for a second. Again and again it would flash and illuminate the heavens as bright as the sun. This heavenly display was full of grandeur and demanding attention, lacking in nothing but subtlety. By this time the heavens had ceased their torrential downpour and weeping in sorrow and tears upon the face of the ever mournful people. Though the rains no longer fell, the turmoil could still be felt in the cold sapphire of her eyes, and each flash of the lightning illuminated the blonde of her hair.

The ending of the day had brought with it the ending of school, and Barbara Gordon had decided simply to walk home today. This wasn't particularly unusual as this was something she had partaken in on multiple occasions. She needed the fresh air, and the time to build up the nerve to ask her father something she had been waiting all day to ask. Pre-planning had become a prerequisite whenever dealing with her father she had come to learn. He didn't like to be surprised she had found. Perhaps this was related to his work in the police force she had often wondered. After all, in his line of work, surprises were seldom, if ever, pleasant.

Over the years, since long before she was born, he had seen the darkest shades that humanity could fathom. He had seen the most hideous and grotesque, the worst parts of society exposed. He'd seen things she couldn't even bring herself to comprehend. She'd often seen him in weaker moments crying to himself when he had thought she wasn't around. She could remember all the nights when he was visited by them in his dreams. She could remember all the nights when he couldn't even bring himself to sleep because of them. He'd just sit up in his bed and stare into the wall for hours as if he was looking for the humanity of the world. Then there were the nights when he would drink himself into a stupor and argue with his wife, her mother. Despite having come to this realization though, she couldn't help but find herself extremely frustrated none the less.

She felt that she had been sheltered all of her life. She felt like her parents were keeping her in the dark about the larger world. But she was twelve now, almost thirteen and no longer a child, at-least in her own eyes. Now she yearned to go out into this forbidden world and see it for her own eyes if it was as bad as she had been led to believe. For this, she had her best friend, Kacy. At fourteen and now in high school, Kacy had been out and had seen more, and Babs had often begged her to take her along. Kacy had been hesitant at first, but Babs eventually won through.

So, for the last few weeks, Kacy had been looking for the perfect opportunity to show Babs a larger world. Finally, she found the perfect opportunity. On the upcoming Friday, there was going to be a house party. The parents of one of the players on the Football team were going to be out for a few days, so he took the opportunity to throw the party at his house while they were away. Kacy was invited, she was always invited. All at once, she knew that this was th opportunity that Babs had been looking for. When she told Babs, she was overjoyed. This was her chance to prove her coming of age.

But one obstacle remained. Her father, the ever fearful Commissioner. She knew that if he were ever to find out of her plans, he would put her on lock down and she would become an inmate in a prison of her own home. She would therefore need a plan, and excuse to be away from home so long and so late at night. She didn't want to use the excuse of a sleepover at Kacy's house, as she knew her father wouldn't fall for that one. He didn't trust Kacy. But as Friday loomed, she couldn't think of any other feasible excuse, so she was forced to use that one anyway.

She braced for the worst, because she knew this was not going to be easy. Because she had arrived home so late, she knew that she in for it as she was. As she approached her home, she saw that the lights were off. Maybe she had gotten lucky and had beaten her father home? She silently prayed for a miracle as she crept up to the front door of her house and unlocked the door. She slowly opened the door and gazed into the dark house. Finding the coast to be clear, she quietly closed the door behind her and crept slowly up the stairs to her room. Then she entered her room and quickly shut the door behind herself. She was safe now, she was alone. She let out a loud and long sigh in relief.

"So, why home so late this time, Babs..."

She jumped in surprise at the voice as it cut through the deceiving darkness. Then the lights came on to revel a she was not alone after all. Now she was looking into eyes alive in anger, frustration and even disappointment. All she could do was stare at her father. She couldn't bring herself to say anything. The silence was deafening as it tore a hole right through her soul and left a trail of guilt as it went. She couldn't take it anymore, she needed to break free of this silence.

"I'm sorry, Daddy. I... I was at Kacy's. We were discussing weekend plans and we..."

"You were hanging around that Kacy girl again! I know I told you to stay away from her, Babs!"

"But Daddy, she's my only real friend! You don't even know her!"

"I know her type Babs, keep hanging around her and she'll lead you know where but to trouble! She..."

"Well, what do you want for me, Daddy... To stay at home where it's safe? Where you can keep an eye on me! I'm not a child anymore! Let me out!" Babs was screaming now, screaming as loud as she could.

"Babs, believe me... you have no idea of the evils that are out there! I'm trying to protect you!" Gordon could only feel his frustration raise the more this conversation went on. What happened to the sweet child of yesterday?

"Protect me by keeping me locked up! You can't keep me locked up in this house forever! I want to know what it's like out there! Dad, you don't understand what it's like to be trapped! you need to let me go eventually, who the fuck do you think you are..."

He couldn't control himself. It just happened so fast. The building rage took hold of his mind, and there was no turning back. Without even thinking, he lunged forward and slapped Babs hard, across the face. Then the cold realization of what had just happened washed over him. Oh God, what had he done! He was speechless. There she stood before him, very visibly trembling and whimpering under her breath and hands clenched into fists. He couldn't see her face, as she was gazing away from him and her hair was covering it completely. all he could see were the tears as they fell from a face obscured from view. Seeing this broke his heart. Slowly, he moved forward and spoke with a hushed and remorseful tone.

"Babs, I..."

"Leave me alone" she said between sobs, almost too quietly to have been heard. But he had heard her, and the message hidden in those hushed words was loud and clear.

"Babs, I'm sorry..." he nearly whispered as he put a comforting hand on her shoulder. but she just slapped his hand away and retreated further.

"Don't touch me! Leave me alone!" She was yelling again, as loud as she could. She rushed over to the sanctity of her bed. Upon reaching it, she placed her head against its welcoming surface and cried. All Gordon could do was watch. His mouth was open in utter shock and he held a hand out in disbelief, reaching out to her. But he also knew that the last person she needed right now was him. A thought that tore him up inside. But for the moment he could do nothing about it. So, slowly but hesitantly, he turned around and walked from the room.

As he shut the door to her room behind him, he walked straight to the bathroom. There, he just stood there and gazed at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. He put his forehead against its clean and revealing surface. What had happened to them? How had they grown apart like this? He pounded his fists hard into the wall on either ends of the mirror. Why couldn't she understand that all he had ever wanted for her was to be safe? He then lifted his head and gazed once more upon his own reflection. As he made contact with his own eyes, memories began to flood his mind. Memories of a younger Babs, no older than three. Climbing all over him and laughing. Laughing as she covered his eyes and said "Peek-a-boo! Where am I, daddy!" He could remember how much he used to love playing those childish little games with her. How much she used to like him holding her.

Then there were the memories of her first bicycle without training wheels. He could remember how afraid she was of riding it, how afraid she was of falling over. Eventually she build up the courage to get on the bike and try riding it. He could remember holding onto her, holding her up as she started peddling down the street, with him holding her and running down the street with her, as she yelled " Look, Daddy; I'm doing it, I'm doing it!" as they went down the street together. He could remember feeling an overwhelming sense of happiness and pride in that moment of time. Pride that she was his daughter.

But as she grew older, the happy memories became fewer and fewer. He began to withdraw increasingly into his work with the MCU. Work that had began to take up all his time. She for her part, became increasingly withdrawn from the lack of attention, and began seeking attention from other sources. They rarely spoke anymore. Then her words came back to him, ringing in his ear... "Don't touch me! Leave me alone!". He just stared into the madness of his own reflection as it mocked him. It mocked him, and he hated it. Finally, he couldn't stand it anymore. He gave out an angry yell as he raised his hand and smashed the mirror, shattering it, and his reflection along with it. Then he stood there as he felt the anger subside. He felt it melt away, replaced by the old familiar pain which had always been there, but hiding under the surface. But he ignored it, as he had been known to do. He looked down to his hand, and watched as the blood dripped from it and collected upon the floor at his side. How could he let himself slip so far? How could it have come to this?

He felt disgusted and dirty. He needed a shower. A cleansing shower, to wash the disgust away. So, he stripped down and threw his clothes randomly into a pile in the corner of the bathroom as he entered the shower. He turned the hot water on. It burned him, scolding his skin as it washed over him. But there he stood, not moving. This was his release, a chance to clear his mind and gather his thoughts. It was his chance to forget, even for a moment. But he couldn't escape forever. Soon all the bad thoughts returned. The effects of the scolding water had worn off, so he turned it off. In frustration, he got out of the shower and got re-dressed.

Now he found himself in the kitchen. He grabbed his nearly drained decantaur of Jack from the cabinet, and poured himself half a glass. Then he sat down, and just stared at a glass half empty. A glass of amber liquid which did not move, and neither did he. He just sat there and stared into it, getting lost in its amber brown hues. Ordinarily he would drink to drown out his pain and send it back under the surface. But on this night, he just ignored his pain. He didn't even bother drinking, he didn't feel like it this night. He must have been sitting there, starring at the glass for all of five minutes, when his cell phone began to ring and snapped him back to his harsh reality. He pulled the phone from his pocket and answered it.

"This is Gordon..."

"Hey, Commish. Hate ta bother ya at home. Fraid we need ya ta come back to the station, though. Something big's come up."

(sigh) "Alright, I'm on my way back up, Bullock." he said as he hung the phone up. At that moment, he could think of nothing but Babs. He didn't want to leave her alone on that note. He wanted to make up with her before he left. So, he walked up to her room, up to her door. Then he froze. He just stood there, looking at the door to her room. Now he found himself too afraid to face her. He couldn't bring himself to do it, not now. Instead, at that moment he felt she needed time to herself. Besides, he knew that if he tried to talk to her now, it would only lead to another confrontation. Only God knows what would happen then. This was a possibility that he did not want to face, that he dared not to face. Tomorrow they would have to talk things over, but for now was the time to let sleeping dogs lie. So with that thought in mind, he turned around and left. It was time once again to face the horrors that this City had to show him and get back on the hunt for the ever elusive Mad Hatter.

... to be continued...


	3. Chapter 3

"You can't hold me forever, Daddy; you have to let me go eventually" she had once said. But he didn't want to let her go, he was afraid of what might happen if he did. What she might become. What might become of her. All of her life, he had always been there for her, holding her, making sure she was safe. But the time was fast coming when he would have to let her go. But Gordon couldn't see it coming. He couldn't see that by holding on when he should have been letting Babs go, he was instead pushing her away forever.

There she was, crying into her bed. How could he hit her like that! How could he! Fuck him, what did he know. She never even got her chance to ask about her sleep-over. Not that it mattered much, seeing as the sleepover was just an excuse to be out anyway. Fine then, if he wanted to be that way and keep her locked up. she was still going to get her way. Now she no longer cared if she got caught or not, she was far beyond caring. She stood up and wiped the tears from her eyes. Now her mind was made up. She was going to that party with Kacy, even if she had to sneak out to get there.

With this thought in mind, she walked over to her drawer and began looking for the clothes her father didn't know that she owned. the clothes that Kacy and she had been buying secretly for months now. She pulled out a cute little tube top which came down to just above her belly button. Then she dug further into her dresser and pulled out a small pair of cut-off jean shorts, and the piece de résistance, her one and only thong. It had taken all the nerve she had to buy it. Her father would kill her if he ever saw her in any of these clothes, which is what made this all so fun. She quickly stripped down and slipped into this ensemble. After she had changed into her party clothes, she crept silently to her bedroom window and looked at the outside world. The night had fallen upon Gotham in its entirety by now and the rains had stopped for the moment. So, she slowly and quietly opened her bedroom window and climbed out and onto the fire escape. She then slowly and quietly closed her bedroom window, and disappeared into the darkness of the alleyway. She had gone to see a larger world.

* * *

The music could be felt in the air and through the walls. It was reverberating throughout the entire house, causing it to shake ever so slightly along with the heavy bass of the music. And all around, packed into each room were people, the living heart and soul of the party. They moved with the music, banging to the beat. Grinding and thrusting into each other in slickly sensual movements. It was a truly sublime sight to behold, almost choreographed like a music video. The air was thick with heat and sweat, but also the sweet smell of alcohol and weed. Their combined aroma filled the air and overtook the senses and the hormones of all who were present. All around could be seen the sights of carnal lust and desire with the sheer absence of any modesty. The cries of pleasure and the moaning and cooing of sensuality flowed into the air and seemed to mesh perfectly with the music and with the mood of the party.

Those not dancing were lounging, drinking, smoking, making out. All the carnal sins were being violated this night. Perhaps most interesting of all was that no one present was older than seventeen. And the youngest? Well, you don't even wanna know. Though in all likelihood, at twelve, Babs was probably the youngest party attendee present. But no one seemed to notice, or they really didn't care. Either way, no one said anything. She had finally reached a place she had always wanted to be in and she took it all in with eyes hungry and full of yearning. A burning desire to be in and of the crowd. If innocence was ignorance, then she was most eager to be rid of it and swim deep of the carnal knowledge. In her eyes, she was not a child anymore and this was where she wanted to belong. And there before her was Kacy. Taking her by the hand and leading her down the road to pure desire.

Before long, she and Kacy had merged their way into the crowd. They worked their way into what must have been a living room and immediately joined in with the crowd as they danced and swayed to the music. There was almost a hypnotic quality to the music. It seemed to control movements to all who danced under its influence. Though the music was loud and she could feel the bass reverberating throughout her entire body, the music had started to fade into the background as Babs none the less moved and swayed to its beat. But now all she was aware of was in front of her and all around her. A mass of people moving in every which way. Some movements were choppy while others were fluid and smooth, but all were moving. hands were everywhere. In the air, around waists, up shirts, down pants. She was caught in the moment, caught in the middle. She was dancing with Kacy, dancing in close with her friend. Hands on her hips. Hands above her head and swaying, grinding into each other. Pushing against her friend. Moving in rapid fluidity, positions always changing. Hovering just above the floor. All in the name of fun. The music seemed to be going in a continuous loop and never seemed to stop. For Babs, this was it; this was freedom. A freedom she had never experienced before. She had her first taste of it and she would never give it up. Not now, not ever, not without a fight.

Though at first she was nervous about sneaking out, now she found herself without regrets. Long live the night. They had been dancing for what seemed to them to be hours, but was more likely closer to minutes. Soon they left the mob and made their way around the whole of the party. Stopping to talk to an old friend or a new acquaintance. Stopping to talk to some cute guy. Never handing around longer than a few minutes. Always on the move. Moving from one new experience to the next. Trying to see it all in one night. When Babs became thirsty, Kacy brought her a cup full of some kind of hard liquor. Though Babs was shy about trying it at first, her friend's influence on her was by now unbreakable. So in this night, at this party, Babs sampled her first taste of this forbidden elixir. She didn't know what it was, but it was brownish and black, and smelled strong and bitter-sweet. But it's taste was another matter all together. It had an oily taste and texture. A strong and bitter taste, almost like a poison. And though it was iced down, it burned her mouth and throat as she took it all in. It was a little much for her, and she coughed fiercely after her first taste. As she did so, she could feel some of it move up her sinuses and up through her nose, burning all as it went. It made her eyes water, and it made her feel sick. But also, she found something else, a different feeling. A sort of burning desire for more. It was a forbidden fruit, alluring and always out of reach. But she had finally caught up to it, and from here there was no turning back.

Within a matter of minutes, she was heavily inebriated. She head was spinning and her vision was hazy. Her speech was slurred, and she could hardly walk. But she felt a rush she had never felt before. It felt amazing. all her inhibitions were now completely gone. She found herself in a large group of people in what she assumed to be a bedroom and with no recollection of how she got there. As she looked around, she found that Kacy was no longer with her. All that she could see were people in various stated of undress and making out. But what caught her attention most of all was the blunt. The people on her left were smoking it and passing it around. Soon it came to be handed to her. Without even thinking, she took it, put it to her lips, and breathed it in. The room went hazy as her eyes teared up. The smoke went all the way to her lungs and she held her breath, trying to keep it in, but she wasn't able. It aggravated her so that within a matter of seconds, she was coughing uncontrollably. As she coughed, she let the smoke escape her lips as she slowly gave herself over to gravity. Her body fell in a gentle arch and she found a lowly place upon the floor with a hard crash. The fall had hurt, but this pain felt somehow different. This pain felt amazing. How could something so bad feel so good all of a sudden? She let the thought flow through her mind as the greatest sense of eurphoria she had ever felt settled upon her. So there she lay, breathing deep and staring at the ceiling.

Soon, she lost all track of what was even happening to her. She had somehow ended up in some guy's lap. Some guy she had never met before. He was kissing up and down her neck and his hands were all over her body. But her mind was gone, still sailing through a sea of euphoria. But as he tried to find a way down the hem of her shorts, she became over stimulated and she panicked. Suddenly she felt her mind falling back down to her physical person. Then she felt a wave of fear wash over her. Without even thinking, she slapped this guy across his face and raced out of the room and down the hall as fast as she could. She practically jumped down the stairs. Her vision was fixed forward and though there were people around her, she paid of them no mind. They didn't even seem to notice her either. All she could hear was their laughter. She needed to leave this place. Though her house must have been a few hours walk from here, she felt like she could walk it.

* * *

Not long after she left that house behind her, she felt a calm fall over her as she haphazardly made her way down the dark street. There was very little light and she really couldn't see anything, but she didn't care; all she wanted to do was put some distance between her and that house. If she were sober, she would have sensed the inherent danger she was in, but her senses were numb and she just kept moving through the darkness of a barely and dimly lit street. She didn't even know where she was, she was completely and hopelessly lost. But her mind was still too clouded to care very much to think about the predicament she found herself in as the she walked. Soom she felt tears flow down her cheeks. Great, now she was crying. Then she felt more tears, hitting her in her face. As she looked up, she slowly realized that the sky was crying on her. Damn sky. Damn her luck. She stopped to take this all in. she let the rain fall on her, praying that it would carry away her sins of that night. It wasn't that she really even felt guilty, but a little spiritual cleansing wouldn't hurt she thought. She was far more afraid of the hell she knew awaited for at home. She was afraid of facing her father, lest he find out about her new found nightlife. Her new found sense of freedom.

Then, seemingly from out of nowhere, a light was cast upon her. She turned around in panic, only to come face to face with a car. As she watched, this car pulled up next to her and stopped. He mouth dropped in surprise at what she was seeing. she was staring at a dark sports car, a Lamborghini? Though she didn't know what model it was, she did know that it was expensive. At this moment, she was feeling excitement, though what it should have been feeling was an overwhelming sense of danger. As she looked on, the driver side door opened up, and a flood of music hit her ears. then a man stood up form out of the car and looked her over. He was an odd looking man, with black and white hair covering half of his face, and one red eye (contacts, she thought to herself) visible though the other. He had one eyebrow and one lower lip pierced that she could see. Though it was dark, she could make out that he was wearing black clothes and that he was rather pale (goth make-up. she thought to herself). He was a young man, maybe in his mid to late twenties. As she finished looking him over, the man finally took the initiative and broke the awkward silence.

"Oye luv, need a roide?" , he spoke in a funny accent, which made her smile ever so slightly. But as she stood and stared at the man before her and as his voice rang through her head, she suddenly realized that the man seemed somehow vaguely familiar to her.

"Dzzo... dzzo I knnnow youuuuu?" was all she could bring herself to say, her speech still slurred.

"Oh, I'm sure you've seen me somewhears, luv..." came his unusually cryptic response. But the more that she thought about it, the more she could swear that she'd seen that face somewhere. Then it hit her, she'd seen it on billboards and on the T.V.

"OMG, you're... you're famous aren't you!" she practically squealed, her heart beating so fast it was making her visibly shake. All he did was smile and roll his eyes. Then at last, the realization dawned on her. "Oh my Gawd... you... your that gorgeous catch, Jarvis Tetch; that Illusionist from Liverpool, aren't you! You... you've got that T.V. show! You're like a rock star!" She blurted out, her speech becoming less slurred the more excited she got. But to this, he said nothing. He just stood there and smiled a most licentious smile as he licked his upper lip. Though Babs hadn't noticed, she was now soaked completely through from the rain. A fact which did not escape his ever watchful gaze, however.

" Look, the rain's only pick'n up, luv. So how bout that roide then, eh?" This wasn't right. Every part of this should have registered as suspicious to her. But all that was running though her head was how cool it would be to hang around a celebrity. So without much thought, she walked right up to the car, opened up the passenger side door, and sat down in the car. Her heart was pounding intensely the whole way and she was smiling ever so slightly all the while she did this.

"ere's a good girl" the man had said under his breath as he sat down beside her. She had never felt so exited in her life! She was getting a ride from a famous celebrity! Her attention then drifted to his car. She had never gotten to ride in a car like this before. The interior of the car was flashy. It was all black, and the red LCD lighting was actually hurting her eyes a little, so she started to gaze out the window as they drove up the road. They were now going though the high end district, and all the flashy lights seemed to captivate her, like a moth. She was seeing a world that had previously been inaccessible to her, and she was trying her very best to soak it all in. There was music playing in the background, but to her it was only just background noise, and she paid of it no mind.

"So, where do ya live then, luv..." he finally asked her, his voice breaking through the silence and the music still playing in the background. It was a simple enough question, but she couldn't bring herself to think, her mind was still hazy. The answer alluded her, no matter how hard she tried to find it.

"Oh, nnnnnnnnnoot faaar..." she finally spit out, slipping all over her own tongue. With her mind being as clouded as it was, this was all she could think to say. She finally took her gaze from the window as all the motion was starting to make her feel nauseous. So, she leaned back in her seat and took in a long and full breath. As she exhaled, she closed her eyes and tried to collect her thoughts once more, but it wasn't working.

"Rough noight run ya down, eh?" his voice came screeching across the small space between them. It actually surprised her a little.

"You have no idea." she answered.

"Well, I've got just the fix. Here, take one...". As she sat up, she opened her eyes to see what it was that he was offering her. It was a small white little pill with funny symbols covering its surface.

"What izzit?" she asked with a voice giving off more of a naive sense of ignorance then she would have liked. Though she couldn't see this side of his face because of his hair, she could tell that he was smiling. The thought made her blush a little.

"E" was all he said. Odd name for a pill, she thought.

"E?"

"Yeah, Ecstasy"

"Ecstasy..." she repeated to herself. as he offered it to her once more, she couldn't help but back away a little. Now she had her back against the passenger door. It wasn't the drug that scared her, or getting fucked up. It was just that she was still feeling a bit overwhelmed with all that had happened this night.

"Ah, come on; it's no' as bad as aull that, luv" But still she kept her distance. She just stared at it. It seemed so harmless, and yet for some reason she backed away from it as if it were poison. Why was she backing away from it? She couldn't find any reason. She had already gone this far. She had already crossed the threshold. If now she couldn't bring herself to go all the way with this, then she would just be proving that she wasn't ready to grow up. A prospect she dreaded more than anything else at this moment. So, she took the pill in hand and gave it one last look over. It seemed even more so harmless to her now. After looking at it for a few seconds, she placed the little pill on her tongue, and let it slip down her throat.

"See? That's no' so bad now, was it..." He spoke without even looking at her. It had an unusual aftertaste, which tasted funny in ways she couldn't really describe. She really had no frame of reference. Then she sat and waited for the effects to kick in. Because she was already high, so she couldn't tell if she was being affected or not yet.

"I don't think I feel anything.", she finally confessed to the man. Some drug, she thought to herself, like she was a subject matter expert on drugs all of a sudden. Then the man turned to her and smiled a devious and licentious little smile as he licked his upper lip. She was still far too numb to feel much of anything, so instead she just sat there and looked on at him in fascination. She didn't know why, but the way he looked at her made her skin crawl. But she hardly even noticed this reaction.

"Give it a few minutes, luv." was all he finally said. She let out a frustrated little grunt and started looking out the window once more. It was still dark outside, but the city was brightly lit. For some reason, the lights no longer made her nauseous. So she just sat there and stared out the car window at this brightly colored world in fascination. The way the lights and the minutes seemed to slip by had started to amuse her a little. Without even realizing it, she started to giggle a little at this thought. The world she had always wanted to see for herself just seemed so interesting to her. The lights started to mesh together. Then they began to change colors. All of a sudden, there was a rainbow of bright colors right before her eyes, dancing around., Swirling around as she raced by all of them. She reached out and let the colors slip through her fingers like water. She liked the way they felt against her bare skin. They felt warm to her. In contentment, she let out a sigh, which echoed across her mind and combined with giggling which seemed to be in her voice. The combined sound echoed around in her mind, circling around and around. Buzzing first by the left ear, then the right. She could almost see the sounds as they went, slipping through the blazing light so smoothly. She felt light headed. but not in a bad way. This felt amazing to her. It was unlike anything she had ever felt before. So this was what being high felt like. She never wanted to give up this feeling. It was as though every fiber of her eternal being was alive. She felt like her whole body was floating through the circling colors. Though it looked to her as though she wasn't moving, she could feel her hair waving randomly despite this. The colors were closing in on her naked body now, giving off a most comforting heat all the while. the whole experience was overwhelming, so she slowly began to close her eyes. Now she could feel the darkness close in on her, replacing those amazing colors. But she still felt warm so she wasn't scared. Her mind was still sailing through an amazing sea of pleasure. And just before she faded away into the darkness, she heard a most unusual voice ringing through her head.

"That's roight, littough Alice... down the rabbit hole... Welcome to Wonderland"

... to be continued...


End file.
